Highlights from the "101 Dumbest Moments" in business:
7. High-tech toilets
Too bad nobody gave one of these to Chuck Prince
Japanese manufacturer Toto apologizes to customers and offers free repairs for 180,000 high-tech toilets - thrones that feature heated seats, air purifiers, blow dryers, and water sprayers - after at least three catch fire. "Fortunately nobody was using the toilets when the fire broke out," says a company spokesman. "The fire would have been just under your buttocks." 
15. Bindeez
But officer, it was the Toy of the Year!
Australia's Toy of the Year, a bead toy called Bindeez made by Moose Enterprise, is pulled from stores after scientists discover that the beads contain a chemical that converts into the date-rape drug GHB when ingested. [was that China's fault?]17. Cocaine energy drink
Quite a blow
After receiving a warning from the FDA, Redux Beverages agrees to stop calling its energy drink Cocaine. It changes the name first to Censored, then to NoName. 
22. Co-op Funeralcare
That no-good Uncle Bertie is finally doing something useful
Co-op Funeralcare, a funeral home in Dunfermline, Scotland, says it is investigating reports that employees routinely used the cremains of the departed to keep passersby from slipping on icy sidewalks. "There's every chance people living nearby will have walked through the remains," an ex-employee says. "Some of them probably even inhaled them." 30. James Cayne
Remarkably, he has yet to be weeded out
In July, as Bear Stearns executives futilely attempt to prop up two hedge funds that ultimately collapse amid the subprime meltdown, CEO James Cayne spends ten of 21 workdays out of the office, playing golf and competing in a bridge tournament in Tennessee. According to The Wall Street Journal, his fellow bridge enthusiasts claim that Cayne sometimes smokes marijuana at the end of tournament sessions. 33. Oral B
And we just thought our wives were really into oral hygiene
Lawyers representing Procter & Gamble send a 66-page cease-and-desist letter to British sex-toy company Love Honey, demanding that it stop using images of its Oral B electric toothbrushes to promote a product called the Brush Bunny - a rabbit-shaped piece of plastic that slips over the top of an Oral B to turn it into a vibrator. 36. Best Buy
Let the Best Buyer beware
The state of Connecticut sues Best Buy for setting up in-store kiosks set to a website that looks identical to bestbuy.com but lists higher prices than those they would actually find online. 42. Pfizer
They had such high hopes
Predicting a blockbuster, Pfizer introduces the diabetes drug Exubera, a form of insulin inhaled through a tubular device. It's quickly dismissed as a "medicinal bong" by a prominent diabetic blogger, while the president of the American Diabetes Association, citing lung-function risks, says, "I see it as my job to talk people out of it." Pfizer quickly gives up on the product, taking a $2.8 billion write-off. 
46. Johnson & Johnson
And if those guys in Rome don't stop using our logo, we'll nail them too
Johnson & Johnson sues the American Red Cross for infringement of its trademarked red cross. [where's the love?]49. German screw factory
The red-light district in Amsterdam immediately closed
A worker in a German screw factory smuggles out 2,000 to 7,000 screws per night, ultimately stealing more than a million units. He sells the screws below cost on the Internet, artificially depressing the entire screw market. 50. The Defense Department
Makes you wonder what it would cost to ship a million German screws
Exploiting a flaw in a Defense Department purchasing system, South Carolina parts supplier C&D Distributors rakes in $20.5 million in shipping fees on just $68,000 in sales. The scheme is finally detected when a Pentagon clerk spots a $969,000 bill for shipping two 19-cent washers to an Army base in Texas. [I wonder how many other fleecings go undetected over there!]51. Apple
One, two, three, four, we'll sue you if you send us more
Nine-year-old Shea O'Gorman sends a letter to Apple CEO Steve Jobs suggesting ideas for improving her beloved iPod Nano, including adding onscreen lyrics so people can sing along. She gets back a letter from Apple's legal counsel stating that the company doesn't accept unsolicited ideas and telling her not to send in any more suggestions. [Apple is for the people]54. Research in Motion
This is your brain on e-mail
BlackBerry users are forced to go cold turkey when maker Research in Motion's servers go down for the better part of a day. "I felt like my left arm had been amputated," says one. Six months later a number of prominent addicts - including venture capitalist Fred Wilson and Dilbert cartoonist Scott Adams - admit to experiencing phantom incoming-message vibrations even when not wearing their devices. [Crackberry!]59. Radiohead
Can't wait for the follow-up album, 'In Debt'
British rock band Radiohead makes its new album, "In Rainbows," available for download on the Internet and lets its fans decide how much they want to pay. Sixty-two percent, according to comScore, decide to pay nothing, while the other 38% voluntarily fork over an average of six bucks. 62. Nepal Airlines
In related news, Sony plans to acquire Nepal Airlines
After mechanical problems ground one of its Boeing 757s, officials of Nepal Airlines sacrifice two goats on the tarmac at Kathmandu airport to appease Akash Bhairab, the Hindu god of sky protection. The plane then successfully completes its scheduled flight to Hong Kong. 70. Circuit City
Good job. You're all fired.
In a cost-cutting move, Circuit City lays off all sales associates paid 51 cents or more per hour above an "established pay range" - essentially firing 3,400 of its top performers in one fell swoop. Over the next eight months Circuit City's share price drops by almost 70%. 71. TCF Bank
Take Cash Freely? Totally Clueless Fiduciary? Two Crime Friday?
A TCF Bank branch in West St. Paul, Minn., is robbed twice in one day - the second time when a police detective interviewing witnesses from the first heist steps out to retrieve some paperwork from his car. 73. Easy-Bake Ovens
Hilton quickly files suit against all 278 kids
In February, Hasbro announces a recall of nearly one million Easy-Bake Ovens after 29 children get their fingers stuck inside, some suffering severe burns. Five months later the company is forced to reissue the recall after receiving reports on 249 additional incidents, 77 involving burns, including one that required a partial finger amputation. [not China's fault]
74. Google
Kidding. We kid. That's what friends do, right?
As thousands of eBay's biggest sellers gather in Boston for a convention sponsored by the auction site, Google invites them to a party promoting Google Checkout, a payment system that competes with eBay's PayPal. In response eBay, the single largest buyer of search ads on Google, "tests" a shift of its marketing dollars, pulling all its U.S. ads from the search engine for more than a week. Google cancels its party. [Greedy, greedy! Sounds like Microshaft tactics]78. The Virginia Tourism Corp.
Virginia is for bangers
The Virginia Tourism Corp. scraps an ad campaign featuring people making heart symbols with their hands after it's noted that the gesture is also the gang sign of Chicago's Gangster Disciples. 
82. One Laptop Per Child
On the bright side, they're learning a lot about anatomy
Nigerian schoolchildren receive $200 computers under the U.N. One Laptop Per Child program and quickly learn a few things nobody expected - such as how to find adult websites and how to store their favorite images on the computers' hard drives. Program leaders say future laptops will be fitted with filters. 83. CIBC analyst Meredith Whitney
Her husband, on the other hand, is more than a little freaked out by the downstream effects of the subprime crisis on the world's capital markets
After issuing a bearish note on Citigroup that contributes to a 7% drop in its stock, CIBC analyst Meredith Whitney receives death threats. Whitney says she isn't daunted. She is married to a former World Wrestling Entertainment champion called Death Mask. 85. Singapore Airlines
Fly the don't-get-too-friendly skies
Singapore Airlines inaugurates the Airbus A380, the world's largest jet, with a seven-hour flight from Singapore to Sydney. To the chagrin of those who forked out $15,000 for one of 12 private, double-bed-equipped suites, the airline asks its passengers to refrain from having sex. Says first-class passenger Tony Elwood: "So they'll sell you a double bed, and give you privacy and endless champagne, and then say you can't do what comes naturally?" 
86. Saudi Prince Alwaleed bin-Talal
Fly the I'll-join-the-mile-high-club-
if-I-damn-well-please skies
Saudi Prince Alwaleed bin-Talal buys his own Airbus A380, paying more than $320 million for a "flying palace." if-I-damn-well-please skies
87. SkyWest Airlines
Fly the smells-like-the-
back-row-of-a-Greyhound skies
SkyWest Airlines apologizes to passenger James Whipple after he is barred from using the plane's restroom during a one-hour flight from Boise to Salt Lake City. Whipple, who says he had two "really big beers" before takeoff, winds up urinating into his airsickness bag and is questioned by airport police upon landing. back-row-of-a-Greyhound skies
93. British Airways Part 2
Fly the oh-gross-oh-gross-oh
gross-get-it-away-from-me
skies
On a British Airways flight from New Delhi to London, first-class passenger Paul Trinder wakes up from a nap to find the corpse of a woman who had died in the economy cabin being placed in the seat next to him. Upon complaining about the incident, Trinder - a gold-level frequent flier who logs 200,000 miles a year with the airline - says he is told he will not be compensated and should just "get over it." gross-get-it-away-from-me
skies
98. Intel
Just pop in your Birth of a Nation DVD, and you're off and running ...
To promote the speed of its Core 2 Duo Processor, Intel releases a print ad featuring six bare-shouldered black sprinters crouched in their starting positions beneath a white guy dressed for the office. "We made a bad mistake," says Don MacDonald, the company's director of global marketing. "I know why and how, but that doesn't make it better." 
100. D.R. Horton
Apparently he missed the memo from Bev
"I don't want to be too sophisticated here, but '07 is going to suck, all 12 months of the calendar year." -- Donald Tomnitz, CEO of homebuilder D.R. Horton, on the outlook for real estate in 2007 
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